Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Thank yous

Today we said thank you to the nurses. Those women were very strong for us when you came. They were the ones who cleaned you. They were the ones who dressed you. They were the ones who handed your tiny body to me and your daddy. They wrapped you up with the gentlest touch and photographed you through a teary lense. They silently watched as we sobbed and cherished you. I don't know where they find such bravery, my body quivers at the mention of tragedy in the news, to witness it often, I can't imagine. Your birth will not continue to be our tragedy, I will find something beautiful in it for you.
I made a blanket for you, I hadn't finished it yet when you left. It is almost done. I have wept into it. I have let my milk bleed into it. I have rocked it and held it to my heart. It is soft and I pretend. It is what I have.
Night, night Frost.
Mama loves you.

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